I have a tendency to meddle in things a lot. I ususally have a good idea of what is happening and what needs to be done. I’m also quite good at arranging social things, like outings and get togethers… So I do a lot of that. But to be honest, I also really wánt to arrange and plan things, because that fits my sensory profile véry well; I’m quite overresponsive.
Keeping control of where we’re going, what we’re going to do, with whom, for how long, and so on means I can control the kind of sensory input that comes my way. Very practical and efficient behavior you would say… right?
But unfortunately it doesn’t always help me or others, because it also invites tension. The tension about having everyone participate in my agenda. Being affraid other people are already arranging things (incorrectly!?) And have I thought of everything? Are there enough seats in the cafe where we have agreed to meet? Standing up for a long time or sitting on a bar stool is anything but comfortable for me. And all this is really creating the tension and stress I’m trying to avoid. Which does not help avoiding sensory overload.
But I’m learning – yay!, before I’m 50 – that letting go and letting things take their course also brings quite a bit of rest. Oh… so that’s why my partner is ususally quite relaxed. Because he doesn’t get all riled up about things…. Hmmm.
If I’m being honest, things often don’t need my meddling. Things turn out fine most of the time. With the amount of seats, the place where we end up, how busy it is and things like that. I’d grant every overresponsive person this feeling of ‘let it go and let it be’!